November 18, 2006

Things Better Left Unsaid...

My home girl and I went to grab a late night bite to eat at Denny's and while there I heard one of the most awkward unnecessary things...

Our waitress came to our table and said:

"Excuse me, is everything all set?"

Yes, thank you

Alright, well I have to go in the back for a little while, I'm breast feeding and I have to go pump before it gets real busy in here. Would you like me to give you the check now?

*disgusted* Yes... please.


How disturbing was that?
Too much information lady.
"I need to go in the back..." would have been sufficient enough

14 comments:

Anonymous said...

- my question is why were you disgusted?

- and why is there a stigma attached to a woman performing the most natural thing?

We live in such double standards that extracting milk (or the idea) make us feel awkward and yet watching risque videos with breasts of all kinds being exposed jiggled bouncing , running around half naked

Yet mention pumping your breasts before they (Denny's) gets busy you flinch and are uncomfortable or in your own words "disgusted"..

When you are breast feeding, and don't extract the milk your breasts become engorged and very sore and will leak just to relieve the pressure..

Embrace the beauty our breasts are meant for to feed our babies
Don't feel disgusted JB because she was doing the most basic natural thing a new mother can do........

JenellyBean said...

Hey Sista Alli....

I feel you 100%... I apologize if I offended you or anyone else in the way I posted what I posted.

Allow me to explain... I wasn't disgusted because she had to go pump. It was her revalation to us. We were sitting at the restaurant eating our food. She comes up to us and tell us that she needs to go in the back because shes breastfeeding and has to go pump. That's rude.

She didn't have to disclose that with us and quite frankly, she shouldn't have. We weren't her girlfriends, she doesnt know us. We were her customers.

She should have told us very politely that she needed to go in the back for a while and that the other waitresses would assist us in her absence. I wouldn't have questioned her as to why she was going in the back.

Her service was great. I appreciate her telling us that she had to go in the back, so that we knew she wouldn't be available.
But that was better left unsaid. It just wasnt necessary.

Anonymous said...

What offended you most the idea of her pumping her breasts or mentioning it particularily when you didn't know her??

I can't see anything wrong with her telling you . You were two women, hopefully understanding of the predicament...

No of course you didn't offend...I just find it curious that we are more tolerant of some things and question why she would reveal TMI that would have been better left "unsaid"

Maybe because I am a mother who did breast feed, and quite possibly because you have not experienced the whole "lactating deal" lol we see it on two different avenues...

Wendy said...

I agree. Perhaps she was just anxious and really wasn't thinking about how that would sound to a customer. Or perhaps she thought you would understand being women. Whatever her reasoning, it was unprofessional and I think it was inappropiate.

Dancewithme2 said...

I just think its hilarious that she gave you all that info. Really - all she had to say was - "Let me give you the bill before I go on break."
In general - TMI is TMI - regardless of how natural it is. Thats like - "I need to go in the back and put my contacts in, re-adjust my bra, fix my pantyhose, call my doctor, etc." TMI !!!
Funny.

Stephen Bess said...

LOL! I've been in a room twice when women just started breast feeding on the spot. My wife got a kick out of it because she knows that I'm not used to it (The women were African immigrants both times). However, I was cool and "acted" as if I see this almost everyday. :)

JenellyBean said...

Sista Alli...
I was disturbed that she told me she was going to go and "pump" her breast.
She didn't need to tell us that and it was very inappropriate on her part.
I know you're a mother who has breast fed, so you feel her situation personally, but you really can't see why it wasn't necessary for her to tell us that?

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Sista Wendy...
Agreed, very unprofessional.
Would you have said anything to her?


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Sista Dance with me...
I agree. TMI is TMI. Yea breast feeding is natural, but imagine if she said "I need to go in the bathroom and change my tampon"!!! That's natural too, right?
HHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA

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Brother Stephen...
Did you find it hard not to look?
LOL

You haven't commented on my situation though, are you impartial?

Wendy said...

lol@ dance...fix my pantyhose...Knowing me I would have said something like"Ok, we don't need to know all the business gurlie"

fallen angel said...

LOL! maybe she was just expressing how grateful she was that yall were such fabulous customers...and that was her way of sharing the positive vibes back with yall??? LOL! i'm sorry. i was definitely reaching with that one! maybe she was just being inappropriate and was tired from working at damn denny's and just said the first thing that came to her mind... :-/

thanks for stopping by my sight today! i appreciate having visitors! :-)
~fallen angel

JenellyBean said...

Sista Wendy...
You stole the words from my mouth! I was sooo close to saying her to her "We didn't need to know all that!" but ofcourse I didn't. My girl and I have a really good past time memory now. :-P


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Heyyy Fallen Angel...
You were definately reaching real high with that one. LOL

You are welcome, I plan to be more then just a visitor.
Thanks for returning the love. Hope to see you more often.

Stephen Bess said...

As for the lady saying that to you, T.M.I. :) Too Much Information! Happy Thanksgiving to you! Peace~

chele said...

I was kind of put off by the word "disgusted" too. I guess if you've never had engorged boobs before you don't get it.

I remember one day at work a lady was coming out of what I thought was a closet. I gave her a funny look and she said that she had to pump. I nodded knowingly and kept it moving.

Emmanuel.K.Bensah II said...

Hi all, I'm with Wendy and Dancewithme that it was unnecessary. The waitress is human, and she made a mistake; let's just accept that. Maybe she felt a degree of conviviality towards Jennelly and her friends, but, come on, in the long run, she's your customer--not your friend.

It really was TMI!

urban butterfly said...

Well, I can see it from both perspectives. She probably wanted to let you know what she was doing in case you needed her assistance and couldn't find her. And she probably figured breast feeding is a natural part of life and that you wouldn't see anything wrong with her disclosing that to you because you're a woman. But I can also see your point, that she didn't have to tell you that. But I guess some people are more open than others. If it were me, I wouldn't tell you I was going to pump milk out of my breasts. LOL. I probably would have told you I'm going on break or something.

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